Sometimes on the path to her fairy tale ending, a girl finds herself unemployed. I know this because that girl is me! This is part of life, and you should not let it get you down. Instead, you should take this opportunity to do things you would not normally have time for if you were out earning a living. You could volunteer at your local orphanage or help an elderly person cross the street! You could see how television looks in your apartment with the shades drawn for four days straight! You could spend time researching what happens if you tell American Express that you never got their last two bills!
But before you do any of these things, you need to file for your unemployment benefits. This is not always easy, but relax! Learn from my experience. Follow these three easy steps.
Step One: Sit down. This is going to take a minute. Pour yourself a cup of tea.
I prefer Fortnum & Mason tea, which is only available in the UK, although you can order it through their website.
If that is not convenient, you can substitute Devonshire Tea, which is only available in the UK and not sold online.
Step Two: If, like me, you have had several employers in the last 18 months (congratulations on being too fabulous to stay in one place), it will be easier for you to call than try to file online. This way you don’t need to have your exact dates of work with each company, you just need to remember the names of the companies. The phone number for the English line of the CA Employment Development Department is 866-300-5616.
Phone by AT&T. A handy feature that this phone includes it announces the caller ID. So when I am deep into my 5th episode of House Hunters for the day, and I hear the phone chirp, “Call from Chase Visa” I know I don’t have to get up!
By now you have called that line four to five times, only to be told that there are too many callers waiting, and that you should try back later. Girl, times are hard! Now I’ll let you in on a little secret. You are never going to get through. Ever. You can try all week and you will not get through. I know because I have tried. But if you are a savvy modern woman, like me, you will try unconventional methods.
Trailblazer.
Step Three: Try the Vietnamese line. They are not as flooded with calls as the English line is. You don’t speak Vietnamese, you say? That’s ok. I’ve picked some up over the years, and this is a fantastic way to hear a new language! Here is how you get through.
- Dial 800-547-2058. Wait for the initial message to pause, and then press 6.
- Wait for the speaking to end, and then press 7.
- Wait for the speaking to end, then press 3.
- Wait for the speaking to end, and enter your Social Security number.
- Wait for the speaking to end, and press 1.
Now you should hear elevator music (American, not Vietnamese), which lets you know you are on hold. When they answer, you can address them in English.
Congratulations! You have successfully gotten through to Unemployment! Check back here for more tips on making the most of your vacation from an income!
“You could spend time researching what happens if you tell American Express that you never got their last two bills!” Hahaha, I have done this research myself, it’s a real treat to master!
Okay, I totally tried this – I have no idea what they said, but it resulted in EDD’s automated stuff hanging up on me. I guess there were too many people waiting on that line, too.
Try a few more times! Sometimes it takes a couple of attempts.